Want more people in your life, but too scared to get out there? Step into my dojo.

They Are Evil…At First

Alright, so I think everyone understands the approach methods, I repeated it enough times. For those who have used it you have probably had different responses. One is the positive response: Everyone found you funny and interesting. They could read that you are having a good time and interacting with everyone around you. That is an easy crowd to transition into more stuff with which I will talk about in later blogs.

What I want to talk about is other response that most likely was given; the mean or “bitchy” response. You walked up, put on your smile, asked a question, and all you get in return is completely rude and mean responses. I once walked up to a group, asked my question and they responded, “Do I know you?” After saying no they turned back around and completely ignored me. It is a hard concept to work with, but you can break that wall.

Most of the time people will not ignore you; they will put up a “defense shield.” Remember, these people do not know you. They are going to question your reasons for talking to them through a series of tests. Don’t take their crap. An easy way is to call them out on it. Never apologize for trying to meet them, “Oh I’m sorry to bother you;” what are you sorry for? At most public places, people are out to meet new people, but they don’t want just anyone to approach them. They want someone who is going to fight through and pass their tests.

My Story:

I was out at JJ Madison’s one Tuesday, and saw a group of girls interacting at a table in the area where karaoke is going on. They were all laughing, having a fun time, and it seemed like at good opportunity to meet them during such a positive moment.

“Hey guys,” I said. “Which one is the singer in this group and going to help me with ‘Baby Got Back’?”

One girl responded, “Your face looks so shiny from here.” It was said with kind of a rude attitude. She was trying to lower my self esteem to make me feel embarrassed and possibly walk away. I was not going to let her win.

“Really? We must be a good match then. Have you been sweating?” The group laughed. They could not believe I shot back with a zinger about her appearance. She most likely acts bitchy to everyone who approaches them on their outings. She is like a guard dog, keeping any possible threat away from her friends.

I responded again, “It’s not bad, here,” I dabbed her cheeks with a napkin, “I have the magic touch.” She put on a smile, and gave me a thank you.

I let off enough evidence that I am not looking for anything else but interaction. I have no longer appeared threatening to anyone close to her. Just keep on that smile, and don’t take anyone’s crap.


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